Facebook Clicking Will Not Change the World, We Have Work To Do
Yesterday, North Carolina passed Amendment One. My Facebook page went crazy with anger. Lots of “I’m never going to North Carolina again”s.
Well, the truth is that that are constitutional amendments banning marriage equality in one form or another in the majority of states. Thirty to be exact. (Actually, thirty-one, but I’m mildly confused as to what the hell is going on in Hawaii.) If we are going to boycott states, we need to boycott: Alaska, Nevada, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Oregon, Colorado, Tennessee, Arizona, California, Nebraska, Arkansas, Georgia, Kentucky, Louisiana, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Utah, Kansas, Texas, Alabama, Idaho, South Carolina, South Dakota, Wisconsin, Florida, Michigan, Virginia and now North Carolina. (When I took the screenshot of the map on the right, from Wikipedia, North Carolina hadn’t been updated yet, so it appears to have no constitutional amendment.)
Our opponents have an easier job than we do. They reach into the dark part of the heart ~ the part in each and every one of us that is viscerally afraid of the other ~ of the different ~ and they manipulate that fear and lay the blame for our collective ills squarely at the feet of someone else. Someone different. Frankly, it’s the reality show version of politics. It trades on the same instinct in us that likes Jersey Shore and the Real Housewives franchise because it makes us feel better about ourselves by making others seem utterly horrific. It’s not new. It’s not difficult. And it is successful.
Here’s the hard part. It is not enough to take to Facebook and tell each state to “Suck it.” It is not enough to be “ashamed of our country.” If you find that you are ashamed of our country, then it’s time to create a country you can be proud of. Change does not happen on its own. We are right. We are on the right side of history. Unfortunately, being right doesn’t necessarily mean winning and it certainly doesn’t mean easy. Our job is more difficult. It requires more stamina. It requires that we go into our communities and make change, one person at a time. It is up to each and every one of us. It’s up to me. It’s up to you. Go online. Find your local HRC chapter. Find your local GLSN. PFLAG. GLAAD. Find local organizations near you and give of yourself.
June is almost here and coast to coast Prides are coming up. Have you ever wondered why Pride is so much fun? Because it is a place where we can relax ~ where we are unlikely to encounter violence and where the voices which condemn us are relegated to the role of cartoonish, marginalized caricatures. It is a day where they are the minority. Pride is fun because we can hold our partner’s hand with the unselfconscious ease afforded to our straight friends and family every single day of their lives. Wouldn’t it be great to go home and begin to make that uncommon ease common ~ every day, on every street and in every community? This year, use Pride to discover your inner activist. It is a great a resource. The booths are there. Sign up. Walk away from Pride proud that you are getting involved and helping to change the world. Imagine what could be accomplished if every person at every Pride did that!
It is our responsibility to our children to do something. These laws affect us as adults, but they affect our LGBT children more profoundly. Our children are the most vulnerable, because they are powerless and because the cement has not yet dried on their psyche. These laws send a clear message that they are not wanted, that there is something wrong with them. They provide a framework for bullies to justify their bullying and for parents to justify their lack of acceptance. They make it easier for parents to throw their LGBT children out of their homes. They force our children to live in a world where ignorance and bigotry are supported by law. They lay the groundwork for depression and suicide all the while providing safe harbor for hatred.
We must do what we can. With our time. With our money. With our talents, our humor, our strength, our stories, our voices. We owe it to our children not to stop at Facebook clicks. We owe it to our children to change minds and hearts, each in our own way. One mind ~ one heart at a time.
What will you do?
