This Gentle Pastor Wants to Put All Homosexuals In a Pen ~ Until We’re Dead

Via one of my favorite blogs, The Randy Report ~

Dear Pastor Worley ~

A few questions:

1.  Can we have disco in the Gay Pen?

2.  How did you arrive at the measurements for the Gay Pen?  Have you researched this or did you just throw out a number?

3.  Logistically, how do we get all the gays to the Gay Pen?

4.  Have you picked a spot for the Gay Pen?  (Hopefully someplace with a water view.)

5.  Why feed us?

6.  Who’s paying to build the fence?  Who’s paying to electrify the fence?  Are we going to have to raise taxes for your proposed Gay Pen?

7.  If it makes you “pukin’ sick” to “imagine kissin’ some man,” why do it?  I can tell you with absolute certainty that I will never, ever imagine you kissing anyone.

8.  When new gay people are born, then what?

9.  Why separate the sexes?  That seems kinda silly, huh?

10.  You do know that the word “against” has an “s” and a “t” in it, right?

Please advise.


Ian Rosen

Posted on May 21, 2012 by Ian In: Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Write the Power
  • Paul Meenan

    Why stop at 10 questions Ian? You could keep going all day!

    • Why are all of those chairs in your church empty?

    • You do realize that if you separate the straight men and women they’ll die off too.

    • When you asked “can you imagine kissing some man?” how many guys in your congregation smiled?

    • Can we call the Gay Pen a Play Pen?

    • Have you ever thought about going back to school and taking some English classes?

    • Shouldn’t the straight men and women be rounded up and separated? After all they’re the ones making gay babies.

    • Aren’t you afraid that if you close in an area of hot sweaty gay men a White Party might break out?

    • Will you let a few divas visit the Gay Pen once in a while?

    … geez this is fun!

    P.S. I’m not a über religious person but Pastor Worley has inspired me to pray. “Dear lord if someone HAS to be struck by lightening could you check and see if Paster Worley’s name is near the top of that list?” 

    • fuckyou40

      I don’t want lightning to strike him.  But if I believed in prayer I might pray that the people who follow him begin to understand that he teaches hate and leave his congregation en masse.  And if I were to pray I might pray that this mass exodus would lead him to a simple choice:  stop preaching that way or becoming chronically unemployed.

  • Walkingdichotomy

    How interesting…why do people fear homosexuality? When this type of hatred is spewed, it is purely out of fear, ignorance and inner pain . “He doth protest too much”—What do you fear Pastor, what do you fear?

    Pastor Charles, do we straight people get to visit our friends in this Noah’s Ark compound of Gays–QUEERS!? If not and we turn into your world, please put me with them:).

    • fuckyou40

      I feel like in his world, visiting us in our Gay Pen would probably mean guilt by association.  You could probably check in, but I doubt you’d be able to check out.

      • Walkingdichotomy

         Well, if I couldn’t check out and the lesbians are in 1 pen and the “Queers and Gays” are in another (by the way, aren’t lesbians and Queers/Gay the same???). In any case, maybe the lesbians will make an exception for me in their special pen from time to time:).    

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