Episode III: What Did…I Do?

Zap!

Ow!

Oh, come on! Stop it, pixie Valerie Perrine! I’m getting married. Can’t we do this later?!?!?

She smacked me hard across the face.

Whap!!!

Get it together, she scolded.

I was suddenly über-conscious of the fact that I was standing before friends and family, witnesses. I wondered, are they witnessing this?

Frantically searching the room I found only gentle smiles, soft tears, long-time couples holding hands, welcoming us into the fold. But not a concerned face to be found. Nothing.

I checked back in with my very-soon-to-be husband. Using his eyes again as anchor, safe, and compass, I regained my balance, placed myself in context, took a deep breath. A wedding. My wedding. Guests. Nausea. Breath. He, too, registered nothing of my experience. Shaking my head vigorously, I Etch-a-Sketched away the bad dream and questioned the intelligence of getting stoned and falling into a Village People [continue reading...]

January 26, 2015
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The War Against (Jewish) Christmas

There’s a war going on alright. And it is, in fact, a war against tradition ~ a Christmas tradition. But it’s not a war that Fox News is going to cover.  I’m speaking, of course, of the war on Jewish Christmas.

Everyone knows that Christmas is the day Jews make a pilgrimage to the best Chinese food restaurants. (Yes, the best. Greasy Kung Pao? We’re never coming back. My people don’t play when it comes to Chinese food.) Once we’ve consumed 14,000 calories (most of that in the Shrimp Fried Rice ~ don’t judge ~ keeping kosher “in the house” is another fine tradition), we make our way to the movies. It’s a day Jews spend together that dates back thousands of years. Or maybe just 20 or 30. And maybe it’s really just an American Jewish [continue reading...]

December 24, 2014
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Jack McFarland Is a Faggot and So Am I

Several times a week people tell me I look like Sean Hayes. The conversation usually goes something like this:

Random person: You remind me of that guy from Will & Grace.

Me: Sean Hayes? (Blank stare.) Jack? Just Jack! (I make Just Jack hands.)

Random person: Yeah. No offense.

No offense.

It’s always there.

Why?

Let’s break it down into two parts, shall we?…(click to read the full post of VillageQ.)

August 30, 2014
Arts & Entertainment, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Featured Posts, Inside Voice
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A Question for PRIDE Month ~ Is There Such a Thing as the Gay Community?

Below is my most recent piece for VillageQ.

A few years ago at Pride, an eldergay, upon hearing that I was living with my husband of 13 years (then) and was doing everything in my power to secure the right of every LGBT American to marry the person they love, looked me up and down and said, “Oh, you’re an assimilation queen.” He did not approve. He did not believe that the battles he fought so hard in the 70s and 80s should have led our people to the altar – the purest, most undiluted symbol of banality. As far as he was concerned, gay people had not been excluded from, as much as freed from the asphyxiation of a white picket fence…

To read the rest of the piece at VillageQ, click here.

June 20, 2014
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The Real Reason Amy Kushnir is Upset

Dear Amy Kushnir, Duck Dynasty cretins, Benham brothers, Adam Carolla, and every other human being who has ever squealed about their First Amendment rights being taken or lamented the rise of the Gaystapo, the Gay Mafia, or the Gay Thought Police or who has worried about the rise of “gaytheism.” (Personally, I love “gaytheism” and intend to use it to describe my own personal religious views.)

This letter goes out to all of you ~

The reason you’re angry is quite simple, and understandable really. In a sense, I feel bad for you, because your world has changed so radically, shifted so quickly, so thoroughly, that you don’t know which end is up.

The shift I’m referring to is that your LGBT bigotry is no longer a monologue. When you speak, when you spew your bile, we are no [continue reading...]

May 22, 2014
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Michael Sam Steps Up As Maggie Gallagher Steps Down

Recently, Maggie Gallagher, one of the most vocal proponents of the anti-equality movement, gave up fighting the Purple Menace, Arkansas became the first southern state in the nation to figure out that equality actually means equality for all people, and that includes LGBT people, and Michael Sam, in what is arguably the most important recent development in our march towards equality if for no other reason than the stereotype shattering symbolism, broke through that purple ceiling by becoming the first openly gay player to be drafted into the NFL.

We are winning. And nothing could make this fact plainer than the image of Sam stepping up as Gallagher steps down.

If I may be so presumptuous, I’m going to explain why our opponents are losing. There is one small detail that they routinely overlook. They miss it time and time again. It’s in their demeanor. It’s [continue reading...]

May 11, 2014
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A Master Class in Successful Adultery for Congress

I am excited to announce that I recently became a contributing writer for VillageQ, a great site “where queer meets family”.

Today, my first piece was posted!

Click A Master Class in Successful Adultery for Congress to read it.

Feel free to share!

Thanks,

~r

April 18, 2014
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Brendan Eich & Mozilla ~ We’re Right

In the past week, the gay blogosphere has exploded with the news of Brendan Eich’s resignation as CEO of Mozilla, supposedly due to a 2008 donation to Prop 8.  Andrew Sullivan lit the fuse when he posted The Hounding Of A Heretic on his blog, a scathing review of the evil gay fanatics that forced the departure:

Will [Eich] now be forced to walk through the streets in shame? Why not the stocks? The whole episode disgusts me – as it should disgust anyone interested in a tolerant and diverse society. If this is the gay rights movement today – hounding our opponents with a fanaticism more like the religious right than anyone else – then count me out. If we are about intimidating the free speech of others, we [continue reading...]

April 7, 2014
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Michael Sam is Not Alone ~ And It’s Time for the NFL’s Gay Players to Stand with Him

One week has passed since NFL prospect Michael Sam made the historic announcement that he is gay.  Pretty much everyone with a keyboard has weighed in on the subject.  Players to pundits.  Fervent fans to religious fanatics.  The words “distraction,” “difficult,” “scrutiny,” “risk” and “pressure” have all been used when discussing the story.  Even the idea that Sam might not be drafted at all purely because of his coming out has been floated.

We have heard from everyone.  Everyone, that is, except for the only people who could truly help Sam.  Who could mitigate the “risk” he took.  Who could lessen the “distraction” of having an openly gay player on the field.  Who could ease the “scrutiny” and help take off some of the “pressure.”  We have not heard a peep from any of the currently [continue reading...]

February 16, 2014
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Valentine’s Day ~ PAY ATTENTION!!!

About two weeks after we moved in together, my husband neglected to lay out a knife for me when he set the dinner table.  It was one of the most romantic things anyone has ever done for me.

We were big into boneless chicken breasts then, and every night he’d set the table with a knife and a fork for both of us.  And every night I’d cut my chicken with the side of my fork and put away the clean knife.  Until the day he didn’t set out a knife for me.

I know it doesn’t sound like much.  It surely doesn’t sound romantic.  In fact, it sounds a bit odd.  But I swooned.  My husband had paid attention.  He had noticed me.  He had noticed, and acted on, one of my silly [continue reading...]

February 14, 2014
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