Valentine’s Day ~ PAY ATTENTION!!!

About two weeks after we moved in together, my husband neglected to lay out a knife for me when he set the dinner table.  It was one of the most romantic things anyone has ever done for me.

We were big into boneless chicken breasts then, and every night he’d set the table with a knife and a fork for both of us.  And every night I’d cut my chicken with the side of my fork and put away the clean knife.  Until the day he didn’t set out a knife for me.

I know it doesn’t sound like much.  It surely doesn’t sound romantic.  In fact, it sounds a bit odd.  But I swooned.  My husband had paid attention.  He had noticed me.  He had noticed, and acted on, one of my silly [continue reading...]

February 14, 2014
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics
No comment

Grammy Round Up…

Last night’s Grammys made me long to be offended. Crassness. Wardrobe malfunctions. Juvenile pomposity. Obvious drug use. Desperate stunts to cover a lack of talent. None of it was on display. Making me realize that desperate stunts to cover a lack of talent is better than no cover at all. Where was the fuck you rebellion, the swagger, the jaw-dropping arrogance, the self-importance? Where was Miley’s repurposing of a foam finger? Nowhere to be found. We had to settle for Pharrell’s Smokey the Bear hat. Meh. It was like watching a meeting of the American Temperance Society. So serious and grown up. At 41, married and living in the suburbs I didn’t even feel old or out of touch. Motown, we have a problem.

A proposition: Why don’t we take the infantile tantrums and staggering arrogance out of the government and put them back where God intended them, in the music [continue reading...]

January 27, 2014
Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Uncategorized
No comment

Today in Gay Derangement: 2 Women Whose GDS Had Led Them to Wildly Different Conclusions

Linda Harvey, founder of the website and LGBT bullying primer Mission: America has a book out (that even Amazon won’t carry) which claims that gay people are closeted heterosexuals. Yes, her rather extreme form of GDS presents as the belief that gay people simply don’t exist.  “The reality is, no one is a homosexual and everyone is a heterosexual.”  I would like to state for the record that I personally am a card carrying, power bottoming, Pride marching, gym and body obsessing, one-time suicide contemplating, occasional body hair clipping, Beyoncé lip synching, overpriced underwear buying, obscure musical theatre referencing, Karen Walker quoting, interested in professional sports only if there’s a hot guy wearing tight pants watching, Barbra Streisand worshiping, man marrying, Oscar dress snarking, cock sucking homosexual queer queen [continue reading...]

January 23, 2014
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Featured Posts, Inside Voice
No comment

Juan Pablo Admits Publicly That He Suffers From Gay Derangement Syndrome, or GDS

Ok, he didn’t admit it so much as reveal his symptoms by opening his big, fat diseased mouth.

Juan Pablo, “star” of ABC’s The Bachelor, was recently asked whether he thought a dating reality show featuring a gay or bisexual bachelor was a good idea.

“No…I respect [gay people]…” (You know there’s a but coming, right?) “…but…” (Uh-oh.) “…honestly, I don’t think it’s a good example for kids.”  (As I pointed out in an earlier post, one of most common symptoms of  GDS is the stripping of words from their meaning.  JP respects gay people, he just doesn’t want children exposed to our filthy lives.)  “Now there is fathers having kids and all that, and it is hard for me to understand…” (I feel that a lot of things are hard for JP [continue reading...]

January 20, 2014
Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Featured Posts, Inside Voice, Uncategorized
No comment

Gay Derangement Syndrome Strikes Again

Another person has been claimed by a powerful disease.  Trestin Meacham has succumbed to Gay Derangement Syndrome.  Sadly, he is not alone.   Trestin is just one of many documented cases of people having been driven to absolute insanity by the idea that gay people exist.  Indeed, he has lost his mind.

You may recall Trestin, if not by name then from the two week hunger strike he went on in the hopes of stopping gay Utah couples from marrying.  When the Supreme Court ordered a stay on Utah’s same-sex marriages while the case was under appeal, he started eating again.  Beginner.  It is unclear at this time if he believes his efforts helped to bring about the stay.  Frankly, I wasn’t all that impressed.  What he called a hunger strike I used to call getting ready for Broadway Bares.  [continue reading...]

January 17, 2014
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Inside Voice
No comment

Governor Christie ~ Is it Too Much to Ask That You Be Both Honest AND Respectful?

There are a few things that have been going on over here in Jersey during the Christie years that have driven me absolutely insane.  Actually, they’re not going on over here in Jersey, they’re going on in the media’s blind spot to my governor.

The other day I watched Governor Christie at his lengthy press conference.  In the interest of full disclosure, I must admit that I didn’t make it through the entire thing.  Nearly two hours of watching someone explain why they deserve to be first person on the Titanic’s dinghies is a long time.  We got it.  You didn’t know.  You just heard.  You were working out.  (Not for nothin’, am I the only person who thought that remark was a particularly overworked piece of political theatre ~ wedged in there like a nun at [continue reading...]

January 11, 2014
All, Featured Posts, Inside Voice, Write the Power
No comment

Little Byte Lies

Mark Twain wrote:  “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”

Well, kind of.  I mean it’s accurate, but incomplete.  As the Christie administration recently discovered, there’s another adage that only the remarkably arrogant or unbearably stupid ever forget:  Never put anything in writing!   I’m guessing the people involved in the George Washington Bridge scandal ~ a bridge named, ironically, after a man who could not tell a lie ~ are both.

But I’m not one to judge.  Listen, lying in the Posting Modern Age is hard.  Harder, in fact, than it has ever been in the history of humankind.  Harder than it’s been since man first stood erect.  Harder than it’s been since man first got erect.  And I think we can all agree that erections are the leading cause of lies.

Take a [continue reading...]

January 10, 2014
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Inside Voice
No comment

Dear Jonathan Capehart ~

I agree with you on many of the points you made in your Washington Post piece about Aaron Schock and I applaud you for reaching out to anyone with actual information that could turn his history of pro-bigotry voting into a history of hypocrisy.

But can you do me a favor?  Can you please not refer to coming out as “an intensely personal journey that involves stages of self-discovery and self-acceptance” as if it is an inherent part of being gay?  It is not.  The journey you refer to is about the shedding of shame.  And we are not born with shame, we are taught it.

If we are going to talk about that journey, however, then we need to discuss its origins.  It is rooted in anti-LGBT votes like the ones Rep. Aaron Shock has [continue reading...]

January 8, 2014
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Inside Voice, Write the Power
No comment

Cover Letter

Applying for jobs online is like dropping a penny down an infinite well ~ you wait and wait for a plop that likely never comes.

You attach your resume, write a cover letter highlighting exactly where your skills and experience intersect with the requirements for that particular position, fill out any fields that weren’t auto-populated, make sure to use appropriate keywords, check for typos, double-check for typos, step away from the computer for twenty minutes, and finally reread everything backwards to triple-check for typos. You take a deep breath. You hit send. A decision that can never be undecided. And that application disappears. Into the ether. Never to be seen or heard from again. Plop???

Where do these applications go? It’s a question for the ages. I must admit that lately, spurred on by the feeling that they aren’t going anywhere, I have begun to tell the truth. Why not? What do [continue reading...]

January 8, 2014
All, Inside Voice
No comment

Dear Robin Roberts ~

Mazel tov on coming out!  I am a firm believer in the fact that coming out of the closet is the single most powerful thing we can do to end the prejudice, violence and inequality that the LGBT community faces.  And when we happen to be in the public eye, coming out, publicly, is all the more important.  Congratulations, and thank you.

What a wonderful and brave decision you made to come out of the closet regarding your illness.  To show it, in detail and unvarnished.  You clearly thought it was important to tell this very human, very vulnerable, frightening and painful story.  You allowed yourself to be seen in the grips of something eating away at your body, ravaging it.  You showed us the war you waged to bring it back to health.  The images [continue reading...]

December 31, 2013
All, Current Events/Pop Culture/Politics, Featured Posts
No comment